Posts tagged good advice

…….just a thought about relationships…

It’s sad to say but I’ve never known love in a relationship with a man, only disappointment and hurt. I am so tired. I’ve recognized my fallback girl qualities or to put it another way, (being 2nd best). I’ve gone to therapy, I engage in positive affirmations and I get involved in really living my life…and now I find myself not wanting to be in a relationship with a man. I rarely find one who isn’t… an Ass. Usually in the first couple of dates I recognize the pattern and get the hell out. It’s interesting that I am no longer fascinated by men. They seem soooo superficial. It gets lonely sometimes, as a woman of 30 wanting male companionship is healthy (as my therapist told me) but I’d rather be alone and sane, happy and whole than deal with the heart breaking, mind-altering crap these men bring to one’s life. I still have hope sometimes that a decent emotionally available man will come into my life. In the meantime, I continue to work on me and find happiness and companionship where I can. Peace and love ♥

Be real. If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and looks like a duck, it is a duck. Hanging some lovehearts, a card, a dinner, a gift, some sex, or whatever it is off someone who is unworthy of your time doesn’t change the fact that they’re unworthy of your time. If someone doesn’t value you, it’s a sign that you need to move on. Know your value irrespective of who you’re with – it’ll ensure… that you don’t keep yourself in bad company and you’ll keep your feet firmly in reality. Tempting as it is to get lost in illusions, you will not get a real relationship with someone who is real if you persist. This is why it is important to be authentic so you can have authentic relationships. If you pretend, it’s a disrespect to yourself and potentially also to them. If you’re not treating yourself with love, care, trust and respect and wondering why someone can’t love you for you, look a bit closer to home and make sure you are being you.

Don’t look at being single as that annoying time that passes between crappy relationships. Yeah you’re not in a relationship but at least you’re not in an illusionary one with someone dodgy. Get on with life and enjoy living because being personally secure and not losing your mind over your relationship status will prevent you from operating out of a negative place. Don’t write yourself off – have faith that there is better out there for you and that in the meantime, you’re going to treat you as you want to be treated. In the meantime, tomorrow is a new day, and don’t disregard your feelings. If you want to cry, cry, and then get back up. You’re human, you love, and you want to be loved, but make sure you don’t have a desperate urge to be loved – it attracts ‘desperate’ types of people that exploit your own lack of self-love.

If you spend a lot of time thinking about an old relationship or an ex, or instead, focus on berating yourself, you’re stealing time from you and focusing your energy on the wrong things. Likewise, if you’ll place your bets on other people instead of taking a leap of faith on yourself, you won’t act in your own best interests. You can’t go forward if you’re not getting on with living the life you’…re in now because you’re trying to hold on to something that has already passed by and was potentially making you miserable.

Keep challenging yourself to be honest. Keep challenging yourself to see things as they are instead of how you thought they were, or how you’d like them to be. Ask yourself what your part is in things, not because you should be blaming yourself, but because we are all accountable for where we are, especially when we keep finding ourselves in the same patterns. Ask yourself what you don’t want to think or talk about – and then think and talk about it. Ask yourself what you’ve been avoiding doing and evaluate whether you should actually be doing it. Be willing to hear and be willing to ask the uncomfortable questions that prevent you from getting lost in illusions.

Treat yourself like a valuable friend who you trust to act in your best interests, even though it means that at times you’ll make uncomfortable decisions that work in the favour of the greater good of yourself. Wake up! Many of us are sleeping on the job – coasting through life, letting life and relationships ‘happen’ to us and thinking that it must be ‘fate’ and what we want. We’re relying on staying as we are and hoping that life turns in our favour. Raise the alarm, set it, and keep setting it every day because if you want something different to what you’ve had, you’ve got to live life differently and be different to what you’ve been. That doesn’t mean fundamentally changing who you are – it’s recognising that relationship insanity is doing the same thing again and again and expecting different results.

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I Promise Myself…

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You are …

You are strong ..
when you take your grief and teach it to smile.

You are brave ..
when you overcome your fear and help others
to do the same.

You are happy ..
when you see a flower and are thankful
for the blessing.

You are loving ..
when your own pain does not blind you to the
pain of others.

You are wise ..
when you know the limits of your wisdom.

You are true ..
when you admit there are times you
fool yourself.

You are alive ..
when tomorrow’s hope means more to you than
yesterday’s mistake.

You are growing ..
when you know what you are but not what you
will become.

You are free ..
when you are in control of yourself and do not wish
to control others.

You are honorable ..
when you find your honor is to honor others.

You are generous ..
when you can take as sweetly as you can give.

You are humble ..
when you do not know how humble you are.

You are thoughtful ..
when you see me just as I am and treat me
just as you are.

You are merciful ..
when you forgive in others the faults you condemn
in yourself.

You are beautiful ..
when you don’t need a mirror to tell you.

You are rich ..
when you never need more than what you have.

You are you ..
when you are at peace with who you are not.



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Words to Live By

Words to Live By



 


Anger is a condition in which

he tongue works faster than the mind.


You can’t change the past, but you can ruin

the present by worrying over the future.


Love ……and you shall be loved.


All people smile in the same language.


A hug is a great gift..one size fits all.

It can be given for any occasion and

it’s easy to exchange.








Everyone needs to be loved…

especially when they do not deserve it.


The real measure of a man’s wealth is

what he has invested in love.


Laughter is Love’s sunshine.


Everything has beauty but not everyone sees it.


It’s important for parents to live the same things they teach.


If you fill your heart with regrets of yesterday

and the worries of tomorrow,

you have no today to be thankful for.








Happy memories never wear out….

relive them as often as you want.


Home is the place where we grumble the most,

but are often treated the best.


The choice you make today

will usually affect tomorrow.


Take time to laugh for it is the music of the soul.


If anyone speaks badly of you,

live so no one will believe it.


Patience is the ability to idle your motor

when you feel like stripping your gears.


Love is strengthened by working

through conflicts together.








The best thing parents can do for

their children is to love each other.


Harsh words break no bones

but they do break hearts.


To get out of a difficulty,

one usually must go through it.


We take for granted the things

that we should be giving thanks for.


Love is the only thing that can be

divided without being diminished.

Happiness is enhanced by others

but does not depend upon others.


You are richer today if you have

laughed, given or forgiven.


For every minute you are angry with someone,

you lose 60 seconds of happiness

that you can never get back.


Do what you can, for who you can,

with what you have, and where you are.





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GOOD IDEAS

"GOOD IDEAS"
Make realistic goals for yourself,

write them down, pray about them

and try to achieve them! 
Go through your cell phone, 

caller id, calendar, and email

addresses and discard all the 

people and events that mean 

you no good or don't benefit your life!
If you are involved w/ a person,

job, or circumstance that is doing

more harm than good, do yourself

a favor - LET IT GO!
Stop being someone's mistress; 

especially if you are aware 

that you are!!!!
Take care of your kids and 

devote a weekend or two 

when you spend "quality"

time with them. 
Get your debt in order!
Stop spreading senseless rumors 

and try to get your own life in order!
Listen more! Talk Less!
Give without worrying about it!
Say no for once!
Tell people you love them before

your hear about some great tragedy

in the world or lose a close friend! 

Speak clearly and not ignorantly! 

Anyone can be a fool. 
If you are married, stop cheating..

If you're guilty of this, ask

God to forgive you 

and don't do it again! 
Remember the Ten Commandments. 



Stop waiting on tax season 
and save now!



Eat what you need and not 

just because you can!




See how long you can go

without checking your cell 

phone when it's not ringing.




Be more positive and 

stop being a grouch! 





STOP HATING! 

If you don't like my style, kick rocks! 




Start telling your children that

when you're having a "grown folks" 

conversation, they need to go play. 

(Remember back when?) 




Appreciate everyone.. 

WHY do we put each other down

for the most ridiculous things?!?





Men and women! Cry more!

It's therapeutic!




Stop tripping about not being 

where you want to be! 

What have you been doing

to get there?!?





If you aren't in relationship,

it's not the end of the world! 

Self love is more valuable!




If God delivers you from a messy 

relationship, friend or situation, 

why do you keep 

PULLING THEM BACK?

Let it go!





FORGIVE! FORGIVE! FORGIVE! 

All of us have been forgiven for

some low life things! 

So open your heart! 

Remember - God forgave you!




Men, stop trying to be so hard 

when it comes to relationships..... 

Let that guard down before you 

lose the one that's meant for you! 




Speak up for yourself!




Learn a new hobby! 



Broaden your mind.



If you're single, start going on more dates 

with different types of people... 

Don't just stick to the same

type of woman or man! 




Stop forwarding all the text 

messages you receive; 

everyone doesn't have 

unlimited text messages!!




Stop replying to ALL!




Live like today like is your last day,

love like God taught us, and 

laugh like you've never laughed before!




Lastly, if it's only 5 minutes a day have a 

little talk with Jesus! Let Him know you

want to be better today than you were 

yesterday and watch Him turn

things around for you! 

































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Hold On Tightly

Hold On Tightly



Hold on to faith; it is the source of

believing that all things are possible.

It is fiber and strength of a confident soul.
Hold on to hope; it banishes doubt and

enables attitudes to be positive and cheerful.

Hold on to trust; it is at the core of fruitful

relationships that are secure and content.

Hold on to love; it is life's greatest gift of all,

for it shares, cares, and gives meaning to life.

Hold on to family and friends;

they are the most important people in your life,

and they make the world a better place.

They are your roots and the beginnings

that you grew from; they are the vine

that has grown through time to nourish you,

help you on your way,

and always remain close by.
Hold on to all that you are and

all that you have learned,

for these things are what make you unique.
Don't ignore what you feel and what you

believe is right and important;

your heart has a way of speaking

louder than your mind.
Hold on to your dreams;

achieve them diligently and honestly.

Never take the easy way or surrender to deceit.

Remember others on your way and take

time to care for their needs.
Enjoy the beauty around you.

Have the courage to see things

differently and clearly.
Make the world a better place one day at a time,

and don't let go of the important things

that give meaning to your life.












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DAILY ACCEPTANCE PRAYER


DAILY ACCEPTANCE PRAYER

I accept myself completely.

I accept my strengths 

and my weaknesses,

my gifts and my shortcomings,

my good points and my faults.

I accept myself completely 

as a human being.

I accept that I am here 

to learn and grow, and

I accept that I am learning and growing.

I accept the personality 

I've developed, and

I accept my power to heal and change.

I accept myself without condition 

or reservation.

I accept that the core of my being 

is goodness and

that my essence is love,

and I accept that 

I sometimes forget that.

I accept myself completely, 

and in this acceptance

I find an ever-deepening inner strength.


From this place of strength,

I accept my life fully and

I open to the lessons it offers me today.

I accept that within my mind

are both fear and love, and

I accept my power to choose

which I will experience as real.

I recognize that I experience 

only the results of my own choices.

I accept the times that I choose fear

as part of my learning

and healing process, and

I accept that I have

potential and power

in any moment to choose love instead.

I accept mistakes as a part of growth,

so I am always willing

to forgive myself and

give myself another chance.


I accept that my life is the expression 

of my thought, and

I commit myself to 

aligning my thoughts

more and more each day

with the Thought of Love.

I accept that I am

an expression of this Love.

Love's hands and voice 

and heart on earth.

I accept my own life

as a blessing and a gift.

My heart is open to receive,

and I am deeply grateful.

May I always share the gifts that I receive

fully, freely, and with joy.


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