You don’t have to have the perfect job, successful career, a house and whatever else you think you need. You don’t have to be fully established to fully commit or get married. You just need to be making progress towards your goals and dreams. One of the wrong things I’ve been taught and so have many is that you have to have be fully independent to build something with someone so whatever each other bring to the table is extra. Well that’s good but it’s being done with a fear that the person may leave so therefore let me have plan B. What happened to building with each other, what happened to depending on each other?
People don’t see that but it’s no different than guys and girls building something with someone they are interested in yet have talking buddies as back up, it fits in all this side chick, side dude idea. We are quick to make sure to have an open door if things fail making it hard to succeed because failure is always on your mind.
If I have to get a prenup with the person I’m marrying I’m not marrying them. Love doesn’t have a plan B. Love is we are going to make things work no matter what. I need someone with the same mindset so giving up and running isn’t an option. Even when we aren’t happy. So with the fear of divorce, the fear of being left and a plan B sowed into us by modern society. We can’t help but make sure “we are good” if anything goes wrong. We spend so much time investing our hearts and promising forever only to live as if forever doesn’t exist. (Forever= till death tears us apart). Defeats the purpose. Love becomes a just words and marriage becomes more of a contract than anything else.